HOW THE EARTH BEGAN

by RELIGIOUS PHASE

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01:53
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03:51
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01:51
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03:15
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01:27
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02:00
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02:34
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credits

released June 16, 2015

RELIGIOUS PHASE is
theo padouvas
jon gondo
jesse "ramshott" rimler
michael coleman
SNEAL

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RELIGIOUS PHASE Oakland, California

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Track Name: how the earth began
alright take your seats
there should be enough room

first of all i want to thank everybody for being here
this is a quite a crowd
and thanks to the band
let's give them a hand

you know just before i walked in
and crossed the podium
i saw a little girl in a big parking lot
and she asked me
do i know how the earth began
well nobody does little girl
i don't care what anybody tries to tell you
but i do know how the world ends

there are thousands of pockets of magnesium
that radiate from the fat deposits
and the light rays and the dark matters
that hide in corner of every solar complex
puddles of gas that spit like old foreigners
built to endure only up to 1000 lbs of pressure applied
and then explode

but really i just want to thank everybody for being here
this is quite a crowd
and thanks to the band
give yourselves a hand
Track Name: dance club
ocean is trashier than any dance club
Track Name: big marquee
(guess whose name's lit up on the big marquee)
Track Name: 16 sons
did i ever tell you i had 15 sons and fourteen daughters
all of them slaughtered
i sent them right off to afghanistan
and i'd do it again
nine times out of 10

i don't even know what we were doing there
and i just found out we're still there
gotta be a pretty goddamn good reason for that my friends

did i ever tell you i had fifteen wives and 14 died
then i had fifteen slices of cherry pie

and did i ever tell you i had 15 sons and fourteen daughters
all of them slaughtered
sent them right off to afghanistan
shot them all in the head
i'd do it again
9 times out of ten it was the right move my friend
Track Name: good deal
i know a good deal when i see one

say what you want
i know a good deal when i see one

dead child (for my cellular battery)
lead smile (endless digital capacity)

i know a good deal when i see one
a good deal when i see one
Track Name: insider trading
do you want to know a secret
[omitted for legal reasons]
Track Name: spray in the surf
sure i spray in the surf
yes i'm hunting silver shrimp in sludge
yah i'll wait for woman's willing touch
and welcome ocean flooding lungs
Track Name: sandy nelson
sandy nelson studied bats in africa
a special hat he wore
he accomplished so much
but one day he went missing
only i know his location
Track Name: steel cut tramp
sewing my mild oats
i'm a steel cut tramp
oh how many cream pies
have thighs
like eliza's
oh i cries
if she dies
i'm a steel cut tramp

oh what the tooth fairy he don't know
is if he's hetero
let's help him sort that one out boys
i'm a steel cut tramp
Track Name: story of our birth
for lack of funds
we will undress
and tell the story of our birth
we'll act out parts of mom and dad
and tell the story of our birth
Track Name: my land of leafy greens
and so i came home
to my land of leafy greens
where the soft turds of my father's telling
had hardened by the empty sun
and my carrot castle was creamed
like spinach
and then cratered in the carrot war

where i sit by the light of my last burning cabbage
which emits the palest smoke
Track Name: tax day
she make hot broth
of old bones
and now me warm of stomach
soon to sleep
make no monster come to me
and tax day
far away
for 1000 years more
we live for free
Track Name: tiger leopard bar & grill
you there did you see who pushed me down
he must have been a big strapping man
for i am 63 but still strong
i carry fruit from farm to town
today i carry trumpet for my band
we play at tiger leopard bar & grill
it is the first gig we've ever had
and now i'm dirty in the mud
did you see who pushed me down
Track Name: mostly jelly
yonder mermaid
o be wary of a rising acidity
and yes the floating plastic prisons that plague your tender sea
continue with the sexual games that made your fame
yet keep one weary native eye on the changing times
for such is right as burning rain
such is right as burning rain

human zeal is plastic death
but mermaid love bears something else

animals i'm the ocean
i decide who's mostly jelly
Track Name: friends & lovers
i made a parking meter
out of silverware
that i melted down
and molded from there
i forged that meter on a sunday
the sleepy town yet unaware

the meter was heavy but mobile
with great effort of force and memory
i dragged it beside me as i moved from car to car
spinning its pole into the dirt
using a concept known as "torque"

here i was in the middle of something very interesting

throughout the week i ticketed all my friends and all my lovers

no one could doubt what i had done
while they stood in line downtown
and no one could doubt they'd be thinking of me
as they waited in line to undo it

yes i made a parking meter
out of silverware
that i melted down
and molded from there
i forged that meter on a sunday
the sleepy town yet unaware